Quiet is Loud for the Insomniac

Oh snap…Two new posts two days in a row…that’s rare these days…

Well this one is a poem. So they’re different. Its the product of my insomnia. I didn’t fall asleep until 4 o’clock this morning…what gives???

2:15 on a March morning

A solitary lamp post

Covers me in its beam

As I sit on a red curb

A silver and teal fire hydrant sits erect

Behind me on a bed of pine needles

There’s a chill in the air.

I look from the earth worm struggling below me

To the stars twinkling above me

And I contemplate the vastness of life

And my limitations.

I listen intently to the whispers of the wind

In the rustling of leaves on trees

And in and through bushes

Hoping to decipher some code that will help me cheat

Through feeling the effects of this insomnia.

 

Insomniac.

 

I’m not alone.

Someone has come outside for a smoke.

Instinctively I want to choke him

For abusing his lungs.

He doesn’t want to fill his apartment with the smell of his cigarette smoke

But he has no problem filling his pink lungs with black poison.

Choking him would maybe speed up the process

But he wouldn’t understand anyway…

 

The lamp post down the road flickers

And for a split second I wonder

I wonder if its a candle with a flame

Waiting for me to blow it out

And make a wish.

I’d wish to not make myself sick

With all that’s wrong in the world

A million thoughts per minute

My questions.

My failures.

My insecurities.

The thoughts that steal my slumber.

 

I look to the sky with hopes that an astral map will point me in the direction I need to go

As it led the wise men to Jesus

As it led slaves to the North.

Usually I can spot Orion’s belt

But tonight, this morning

It’s nowhere to be seen.

Perhaps it’s hanging in my closet

Strewn behind the facade I took off

Hiding from the critics in my mirror

…they won’t criticize you beautiful belt.

 

The hum of the central air unit

Adds background music to an

Otherwise still and quiet moment

 

Still except for the wind’s movement

Quiet except for my screaming thoughts.

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