21 and Valentine’s Day Love

Once upon a time there was a girl who was more or less indifferent when it came to Valentine’s Day.

When she was 14 years old that changed and she became the Grinch that hid Valentine’s Day.

It all started when one of her friends, a girl (we’ll call her Spiral) had a boyfriend who went out of town. Even though he went out of town he made arrangements to have Spiral loaded up with balloons and flowers and chocolates. Of course the girl (the Grinch before she was the Grinch) was happy to see her friend Spiral happy. However, two weeks later the girl morphed into the Grinch after having to miss class and console her friend for an entire day because that same guy cheated on her friend and had been cheating even before Valentine’s Day. SMH. Yes, this was an “isolated” occurrence that didn’t even affect the Grinch directly but this girl who had been pre-disposed to cynicism  became extremely cynical and as a result became critical of Valentine’s Day. This one incident led her to research (by way of observation) the importance of Valentine’s Day and her conclusion was that it was all a sham. She believed that most people used this day as an excuse to shower love in a grandiose fashion on the object of their affection; however, the rest of the year was spent taking taking that person for granted and in many cases cheating on them.

That girl was me.

When I had a boyfriend of my own I participated in Valentine’s Day because I knew that was what was expected of me but my overall feeling toward the day was that of disgust. Why should people celebrate the fraudulent and deceptive all in the name of commercialization but under the guise of love? I have some great Valentine’s Day memories in fact I believe I’ve given some great gifts. Great gifts for guys on Valentine’s Day are hard to come up with. Anyhoo one of my fondest Valentine’s Day memories actually came a year later in 2005 when I received this email:

The last line says Happy Valentine's Day from that fly kid who loves you so much the rest of the text is the poem "Jada" by Tupac

The subject line didn’t match the text of the email and I was pleasantly surprised. If you know your poetry then you know that was a poem that Tupac wrote for Jada Pinkett but I digress. What I liked so much was that in this person who I saw as so nonchalant I had invoked emotions that drove him to find a suitable poem and this one echoed his sentiments at the time. Nice.

But that was then. I was 15 at the time. Now I’m 21 and there’s no escaping the fact that a lot has changed. Even when I didn’t have a boyfriend I participated in Valentine’s Day. I love stuffed animals and cookies-n-creme chocolate bars and my earthly father came through every time. Not only that but I used Valentine’s Day as an excuse to tell my friends I love them.

For example last year I was in full throttle Grinch mode for many reasons including I didn’t have a boyfriend, I was in college so daddy couldn’t do the usual for me and I was going to be spending Valentine’s Day alone or so I thought. To my surprise I had a girl friend surprise me for the weekend and another girl friend and I exchanged cards, candy and bears. It was great.

One year later. It’s Valentine’s Day again. I’m a year older. I’m no longer the Valentine’s Day Grinch. I had an Awesome Valentine’s Day Eve and later on today I’ll be with some of my girl friends but as of right now – I’m by myself although not alone and certainly not lonely.

This Valentine’s Day – I’m 21. I don’t have a boyfriend but I have something much better – The Bridegroom. Not just a bridegroom or my bridegroom, no, today I have a time of special communion with The Bridegroom, and his name is Jesus The Christ.  My friend Samantha J. suggested in a comment that I spend my day with Him. Spending time with God is an integral part to my every day but why not use this day as an opportunity to tell the God-man how much I love Him! He treats me like a bride daily. It’s because of Him that I know my identity, value and worth. So why shouldn’t I make this day extra special for Him? Jesus has feelings too.

To show my Valentine’s Day Love – I’ll be writing Jesus a song. I may also write Him a poem and post it on here but unless/until the song is recorded I won’t be it up on here. I wanted to buy him some flowers and plant them but I don’t know of any nice places to plant them here – my apartment complex won’t allow it. Jesus and I will have a candle lit dinner too.

<- For too long I’ve felt like that when it comes to love and romance. That’s the back view of “I love you” in sign language. It’s like making the sign for “I love you” but then instead of turning it to the person it is being directed you turn it to yourself and look at it like wait “I love you?” and the result is a puzzling feeling. Often times when we initiate the “I love you” we hope that the person will respond with the same sentiments. In fact we have been conditioned by society to expect that. But Paul said Love is the more excellent way. God is Love. His definition of Love is so beyond human comprehension it’s not even funny. Everything God has done, is doing, will do is out of His love for people. God loves even the people who hate Him. You don’t have to do anything to be loved by God. He loves people so much that He made a way for people to be reunited with Him, reconciled back to Him. Still He’s a perfect gentleman and the choice is up to each individual. That way of salvation was made even for those who hate God because He loves them too. As a Christian God’s love for me has motivated me to love Him. If Jesus died for me the least I can do is live for Him. He told me that the way I show Him “I love you” is not to say it but to live it and we live it by obeying His commandments (John 14:15). By the way these commandments are for our own good, He’s only looking out for us as much as possible. He simply asks that if I’m going to wear His name Christian “Christ-like” that I love Him and love others as I would love myself. Do you want someone to sleep with your husband? No Don’t sleep with theirs. Do you want to run the risk of catching AIDS or an STD? No? Don’t have sex outside of marriage. Do you want someone to steal from you? Don’t steal from them. Do you want people to lie to you? No? Don’t lie to them. Do you want your kids to respect you? Yes. Respect your parents.   Do you want someone to kill you? No? Don’t kill anyone. And I could go on…

Bottom line is God loves you and everyone else. Whether anyone chooses to believe it or not that is the Truth. 2 Timothy 2:18 “Even if we don’t believe God remains faithful [in His love for us]: He cannot deny Himself.” That kind of love is not only unstoppable it’s untoppable. No one can love me better than God and I certainly cannot love anymore more than God loves them it’s not even right to compare the two. I’d be in the negatives while God’s Love would be within the range of infinity and infinite infinities. Yea, it’s that serious.

I’ve said all of this to say in all your Valentine’s Day celebrating remember The One who loves you best and tell Him show Him that you love Him and that you appreciate His sacrifice on calvary. He wants to hear it. He thinks the world of you. He tucks you and the rest of the world in at night. He loves you enough to watch you sleep. His love is type heavy. He loves you in spite of your short comings and mistakes and even those flaws and behavior tendencies that your spouse will later see as a pet peeve. He loved you enough to take that time you were in your mother’s belly to hand stitch you together.  There so many ways that I could say He loves you. The signs of His love our everywhere but the Bible tells that story best. Fall in Love again with the Creator of All.

I’ll confess I’m looking forward to the day when my Adam calls me sweetheart (not too much though because I have the tendency to get annoyed but he’ll know that). However, I’m not quite ready to be an Eve because I’m still be shaped and molded. When the preparation process is over my Adam won’t be able to find another one like me. That’s a promise and my Heavenly Father cosigns. 😉

May everyday be a celebration of love in your life.

Wishing all the Love of God, the Light of Christ & the Longevity that comes from knowing the Comforter.

Love, Light & Longevity to us all!

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